I want this guy's job.

This is from a few weeks ago, but funny nonetheless so I thought I would share. It represents my thoughts exactly. :)

A Tyra Conspiracy?

If you haven't watched the America's Next Top Model finale last night yet, then stop reading now. Sorry I tried.

But Oh Em Gee. If you did watch last night, you know who won. Wow. First off I will say that this season by far had the least talent of any season yet. Although Whitney and Anya performed pretty well in their photographs, I was embarassed for them... embarassed... to be looking like they did walking in a freaking Versace show. Versace. In Italy! They looked like such amateurs. I thought it was by far the worst runway finale performance for ANTM finalists to date. Just my personal opinion. Is ANTM on its way downhill? Hmmm......

That said, I was thrillllllllled that Whitney won! Yes she is a bit fake and over-the-top but I think she and her curves are gorgeous and love that a "full-figured" woman won! It is such a good role model for young girls out there - and I hang with them all the time - they need help and a wake up call to what normal is. So yea for the normal women out there! Mind you Whitney is a size 8/10. Yeah I know. Size 8 is supposed to be considered plus size? Excuse I have to go throw up for a bit.

But... oh there's always a butt (heehee)... I think its a conspiracy. And a nasty one if you ask me. There have been pictures released now of a much much skinner Whitney pre-ANTM. What the? What was all that crap about her whining that girls made fun of her being fat her whole life? If you check out these photos, she 'ain't no fat girl. Shoot I'll show you fat girl. So supposedly the conspiracy is that Whitney was a model who was modeling at a size 2/4 and was approached by the producers of ANTM who told her if she gained weight she could come on the show as the "plus-size" girl and at least make the top 3. *&$^&@*. Oh the horror. Okay so regardless if this is true or not about it being an ANTM producer plot, it reaaaaaaaally angers me. Mad I am! That means all of Whitney's crap about never fitting in, being bigger than other girls and the object of ridicule, and wanting to be a role model for NORMAL sized girls out there - is a load of CRAP. Basically homegirl was a gorgeous skinny model who got to sit at home eating pizza and bon bons for two weeks in order to gain 20 pounds right before the show. In my book that aint cool. Or fair (bonbons? yum). Gasp. I know. You're shocked, hurt and feel betrayed. Me too.

Either way, I think the "larger" version of Whitney is prettier than little model size Whitney. Sadly we could all hope to look like her version of a "full-figured" model. I want a real role model for my high school girls to look up to. Not fake made up ones. Disgust. Discuss.

You're so rad

This. Is. Funny. Even if you don't watch the TV show How I Met Your Mother, you should still think this is awesome. And if you don't, well then I don't like you because you have no sense of humor. Basically a character on the show, Robin, has turned out to be a Canadian pop star known as Robin Sparkles when she was sixteen in the 80's... her first video was simply stellar and now this is her second long lost music video, "Sandcastles in the Sand" - full on with cameos by James Van Der Beek, Tiffany (as in "we tumbled to the ground and then we say..."), and Alan Thicke (Dr. Seaver!). I love it.

Oh how I miss the 80s. Oh how I love this show. Someone told me on Saturday night that it is impossible for me to love Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia and HIMYM at the same time because they are use such different forms of humor. Well I disagree with this. It is possible! You just have to have a very complex sense of humor like I do... with a little bit of dysfunction and immaturity mixed in of course.

Where trouble melts like lemon drops

I must confess I am not a fan of American Idol like the rest of this nation. Just never have been (Dancing With The Stars is another story!). I don't watch it at all. However, I do love Aggies (whoop!) and love love love me some dreads, so naturally I have kept tags on our lil Jason Castro... and evenmoreso I loooooove the rendition of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" he did this week, which was originally performed by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole (50 First Dates, anyone? Awesome movie). So in case you missed Jason performing it on Tuesday night's show.. check it out. I mean he's playing a yukalaylee for goodness sakes. Amazing. I hope he wins. But honestly I don't know about any of the other contestants so I'm completely biased and uninformed. At least I admit it.

Movin' on up?

Houston, TX. Not a city known for, well, much of anything besides NASA, oil, and me. But are we movin' on up in the world?

First, the Jolie-Pitts were here in town today (see pic of them in town this morning) - not freaking kidding - and they were only really seen... leaving a Shell gas station. Gah-reat. That's all we got to show 'em don't we? They're in town supposedly because Bradley is shooting a movie in nearby Austin. I'm all about road trippin' it up there. Anyone in??? Justin Timberlake is also in Tejas currently filming the movie The Open Road in Corpus Christi, so its definitely a hard decision which way to go... Both. Tour of Texas it is!

Theeeeen, Paris Hilton's new MTV reality show, I Wanna Be Paris Hilton's New Best Friend, is starting off their casting in good ole H-town. Great. So all Houston is known for are gas and Paris-Hilton-wannabes. Not a good sign. But if you really do want to audition for this TV show, you can this weekend - April 4th-April 7th - at Hotel Icon. I personally think Paris Hilton is beyond an idiot with no talent or purpose to her name and is simply a pathetic demonstration of what Generation Y is currently producing. And since E! decided not to renew A Simple Life, homegirl just had to get herself another reality show and so she is feeding on this current generation's obsession with fame by making it seem like people should compete to be her friend. Sheesh. This is the show's premise:

"Do you long to strut into the world's most elite hotspots without a care in the world except how fabulous you are? Ever wish the velvet ropes didn't exclude you from the social circles of the A-List? Well now's your chance to bypass the bourgeois because Paris Hilton is looking for a new best friend, and she's set her sites on you! MTV is giving the opportunity of a lifetime to one girl or guy who has what takes to become Paris Hilton's new BFF. That's hot!"

Sigh. Okay sadly after reading this I would have to honestly admit my answer is "yes" to both questions above and makes me totally want to audition. Okay don't worry I never will... but there's a part of me that wants to - probably just because of my unhealthy celeb goss obsession. But unfortunately I don't want to be on a MTV reality television show or more importantly be her friend... and especially after seeing the website [ParisBFF.com] where you can also audition by uploading videos of yourself proclaiming how cool-and-Paris-ish you are... I realize how desperate these people are. And I'm not that desperate. I am going to be non-famous but fabulous all by myself!!! So if you do want to be part of this reality-world-wonderment, then go to the website, fill out a casting application and hang out at Icon this weekend! You know I will be there am rooting for you!

Okay and can I just complain about Monday night television shows real quick? On The Bachelor I have had to drop Robin as my fav - she crazy - and I would say Holly would have to be my frontrunner now. I find Marshana (she think she all that) and Ashlee annoying on every level and am ready for them to go home. Like yesterday. Now The Hills... okay Heidi looks like a plastic robot. Seriously during the entire episode last night she did. Its like the producers told her " look sad, crinkle your forehead in dismay, oh and look plastic" and she did so, wonderfully. Maybe thats why she's a feminist heroine. Blech. But c'mon her fight/angst with Spencer looks so fake. I am not buying it. At least he shaved, though, so he no longer had that flesh-colored-facial-hair-you-can-only-see-it-in-true-sunlight look going on - it totally creeps me out. Plus they need to work a leetle harder on making it look more "real" and less "staged"... Whitney's hair kept changing from blonde to honey light brown and back to blonde again in the same situations, and Audrina's hair blatantly changed multiple times during one conversation with Lauren. Ello MTV! We're amateurs and still catch this stuff. Okay maybe I can be considered a professional... :)

One more tidbit on Monday night television (sorda) : for all you Prison Break fans, not only has it been picked up for a fourth season starting in the fall but Dr Sara Tancredi is returning as well. I know! We all thought she was dead, but supposedly/obviously that was not her head in the box and Sarah Wayne Callies has signed on for the whole season (despite all the bitter contract dramarama that led to her being killed not killed off a year ago). So she is coming back and Michael Scoffield is supposed to be getting some lovin' once again. Wa-hoo.

April 10th can not come soon enough

Why? No words really needed...

"I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me. And since I don't have a butler I have to do it myself... so, most nights before I go to bed I will lay out 6 strips of bacon out on my foreman grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again, then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious, it's good for me, it's a perfect way to start the day. Today I got up, I stepped on to the grill and it clamped on to my foot. That's it. I don't see what's so hard to believe about that" -Michael Scott

Productivity is overrated people

Dude my NCAA bracket is rocking the kashbah! Seriously. Okay so each day its rocking less and less... but I was 16 for 16 on Thursday (hollaaaaa), did not do as well yesterday, so after the first round I am 26 for 32. Not bad since I did it all by me-self. But it will probably go downhill from here. Oh well I should have just bragged about it yesterday when I was at 100% and left it at that. Never said I was smart. Oh wait I say that all the time. Crap. Me Aggies play UCLA tonight. Aaaaaaah - that's me crossing my fingers as tightly as possible.

It was such beautiful weather today - we have had some beautiful weather days (odd) as of late down here in H-town. So what does that mean for me? Total productivity. And by productivity I mean putting on a bikini, laying out in a chair, listening to my iPod and doing nothing. Yeah I know. Awesome. But I have been doing some of my pilates stomach exercises while laying out and getting tan, so thats kinda productive right? Oprah calls that "multi-tasking". Although I have gotten better about tanning over the years and don't lay out as much, go to tanning beds or try to get burned, I still love to get some all natural sun. So I have found my absolute favorite layin-out product and I want to share it : Banana Boat Tanning Dry Oil Continuous Clear Spray SPF 8. Who says I can't appreciate cheap products? This stuff is awesome for tanning. It gives you a little coverage so you don't fry fry but has tanning agents in it that help you tan so much quicker. But best yet - you just spray it on everywhere and you don't have to rub it into your skin. Just spray. Its so quick, fast, and easy - I love it. Now I don't use this on my face - I use Aveeno Sunblock For Face SPF 30 - because after the infamous Quasimoto-sun-chemical-burn-on-my-face-of-2006, I always use at least something. But I basically use this Banana Boat stuff everywhere else, and I have yet to burn with it. Awesome. So next time you go out in the sun and want to get a little tannage, grab this spray.

Everyone (who is anyone) knows that The Hills is premiering, once again, this coming Monday March 24th. Can I say that I am almost over this show? They all seem so insignificant to me, but maybe thats what makes it so addictive. Getting to watch people lead insignificant lives... while getting to go the The Ivy and Area of course. Buuuuuut after watching The Soup : The Hill's Returns!, it makes me a lot more ready. Haha. Oh that Joel McHale. Brilliantly hilarious man. Watch it. Viva la revolutionnnne!

I know that your powers of retention are as wet as a warthog's backside

Whew! I am letting out a HUGE sigh of relief. Why? Well remember when I told you about the report that Friday Night Lights was officially coming back for a third season? Of course you do. It was a great day in my life too. Weeeeeell after I disclosed that, there were alot of rumblings from ma sources that it wasn't a for sure thing yet - yada yada yada - and that it could still fall through, not happen, you catch my drift. So many people were so happy about it, I didn't want to burst your bubble. So I just crossed my fingers that it was a go. Well, lads and gents, it is. Sources close to the show say the deal has been inked and is final - the whole NBC/DirectTV combo. So exciting! Well at least I, myself, feel better about not feeding you false information and dashing your hopes and dreams. So, the second season will be released on DVD on April 22nd... it will probably be as cheap as the first season (less than $20) so seriously plan on picking it up. Totally worth it.

I am not sure why but it seems that most of the details on the 90210 : Next Generation show have been released and everyone's been yabbering about them today. I thought Kristen from E! summed up nicely what it looks like so far if you're interested:
The "Jim Walsh": Harry Mills is a teacher who has a real do-gooder way about him and is considered the “cool parent.” Sounds a little more like Sandy Cohen than Jim Walsh, actually.
The "Cindy Walsh": Celia Mills gets work as a personal trainer in Beverly Hills, where she likely interacts with many a guest star. She usually plays the disciplinarian role in the family.
The "Brenda Walsh": Annie Mills is into theater acting, just like her predecessor. But instead of "Color Me Badd," she’s listening to emo bands. She yearns to fit in with the alternative crowd but leans a lot on her adopted brother, Dixon, too.
The "Brandon Walsh": Dixon Mills was taken in by the family about six years ago and has grown close to his adopted sister, though she originally didn’t want him around. He’s very bright, driven and well adjusted, but when in foster care, he definitely had the Ryan Atwood gene, getting into fights weekly. They’re looking for a minority—black or mixed race—for this role.
The "Kelly Taylor": Daphne Silver's character goes simply by “Silver” (so you know who she's related to, right?) and has a popular YouTube series à la LonelyGirl15 (in a bikini). She and Annie become fast friends, and she pines for Annie’s brother, Dixon, hoping to be the first Jewish girl at Beverly Hills High with a black boyfriend.
The Newbies: Navid, the Persian kid, is the executive producer of BHHS’s television newscast. Forget the Blaze, it’s all about TV journalism now. He’s a total politician and can fit in with every group in school. Meanwhile, Ethan Ward is the dim-witted popular boy who falls from grace when his bitchy and spoiled girlfriend, Naomi, destroys his reputation at her Sweet 16 party in the pilot. His attention will soon turn to Annie.

Grey's Anatomy scoopage (SPOILER ALERT - don't read if you don't want to know) - Uno: Gizzie (George and Izzie romance) is fo sho ova fo eva. (Translation: Dunzo. Kaput. Whatever. I guess I am the only one on the planet that finally liked them together). Dos: Addison Montgomery will be making a cameo at one point at Seattle Grace (Dude I would refuse to leave Taye Diggs side if I were Kate Walsh. It would be in my contract). Tres: McSteamy and Dr. Hahn will continue their cat-n-mouse game, but it looks like Hahn will still not be interested and McSteamy will have to learn to deal with women's rejection. Hello! This is obviously not reality television because that would never happen. Why can't we get McHotMuffin some luvin' already??? Quatro: And... dun dun dunnn... supposedly Meredith and McDreamylicious will be together, for good, by the end of the season. Yes that would be within six episodes. So somehow in six episodes, McDreamy will date and dump McBarWhore, Meredith will work through all of her issues, and they will ride into the sunset break room and live happily ever after. Go for it Shonda Rimes. Grey's will return April 24th, along with new episodes of that show, Losh... Last... Lost... whatever.

Okay I am going to recommend you watch How I Met Your Mother this coming Monday, March 24th (CBS @ 7pm). Why? Well first of all the sitcom is hilarious. It is one of the only shows that can make me laugh out loud. The writing is superb and you can not beat Neil Patrick Harris. Doogie, he is not. Better, cuter, so much funnier. Like Doogie on crack. Secondly, watch it because it will be Britney Spears first post-life-destruction cameo. You know you want to. Surprisingly I have heard nothing but great things about the experience with her from the cast and crew and she's supposed to be good (albeit a small part) at her acting stab. It will be interesting nonetheless - and maybe get you hooked on HIMYM as well!

Daaaaaang while you're at it, you might as well consider DVRing Greek. Its the ABC Family show that became a wonderfully-pleasing guilty pleasure for me last year. Its second season debuts this coming Monday night as well (7pm). It will bring you back all the amazing memories of college - the ones you forgot and the ones you tried to. I love it and can't wait for some more Cappie!

Peach Pit here we come!

This has been buzzed everywhere, all over the internet, all day. So why not here as well? Now THIS is what I call good news. What could it be? World Peace? Britney Spears regaining custody of her kids? A back replacement (for me)? Nope. Even better. The CW is plotting a spinoff to Beverly Hills 90210. I know! Talk about a stellar idea. What makes it even better than your little (or big?) brain can imagine is that Rob Thomas is penning/creating the script for it. Now for those of you who don't know who he is (no, not the lead singer of Matchbox 20), let me explain to you the genius of this man. He was the creator of Veronica Mars (hello! Kristen Bell. Duh.), a TV show that was so brilliantly written and critically acclaimed that even with almost no ratings at all, it stayed on the air for three, almost four years. I was devastated when it was cancelled last year. He is just awesome. So CW head honcho Dawn Ostroff has been waiting to work with Rob Thomas again, and I could not be more thrilled that this could be the project! Eeeeek!

One question on people's minds - will any of the original cast members be returning for it? Let me, in my humble and personal opinion, answer that : yes. Why the freak not? What are Ian Ziering (one season of DWTS is not a career), Tori Spelling (okay maybe the home wrecker can now be considered a reality star? hmmm), Brian Austin Green (a show here and there but following around your way-too-hot-and-young-for-you fiance Megan Fox can't take up all of your time) and Jason Priestley (??? All I know that he does are ABC Family movies) really doing? They can all totally resurface in the new 90210. Sadly I am sure we can rule out Luke Perry. Ahhhh. But I can't wait. Something fun for sure. With The CW shows in general NOT doing well right now, how great would it be if they could whip up a pilot and have it ready for this fall?!?! Okay don't count on it - plan for more like Spring 2009, but I will be waiting in anticipation until then.

"Nate - whip me up a chocolate malt! Peach Pit here we come!"

Play below for a little treat!

Tranny. Hot. Mess.

Okay so I promise I am really not going to blog about freakin' SNL every week. Buuuuuuuuut I thought it was HI-larious this weekend with host Amy Adams. So good - much better than last week. I actually thought the Hillary Clinton/Barack Obama 3 AM Phone Call sketch was quite funny/ridiculous and seriously... New Bravo Show... LOL... smokin' hot mess. There are no words to describe the genius that is Amy Poehler. Seriously. And when I think of that, all I can think about is how cool it would be to friends with her and her husband, Will Arnett. They must be the funniest couple, ever. So I could have posted more sketches I enjoyed (Hero Song, for instance), but these are the two I enjoyed the most, so in case you hadn't seen them, I want you to enjoy.

We can once again live for Friday

I can exclusively report... before almost everyone else... that Friday Night Lights has been picked up for a third season. WOO-freakin-HOO! How is this possible? NBC is partnering with DirecTV for a one-of-a-kind deal that will result in shared financial burden of the show and will air on both NBC and DirecTV platforms. Shoot I don't care where its aired and who pays for it as long as it airs. Thank goodness. That was a close one. The best and most genius show on television I tell you... with unbelievably passionate fans. Including yours truly. Get excited for more Riggins people!

Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!

No, its Morgan Freeman

Go set your DVR to tape Saturday Night Live this weekend. If you don't already watch it normally, do it now. In case you didn't already know, Juno's Ellen Page is hosting with Wilco as the musical guest. I can not imagine a better duo. She's going to be fantabulous. I regret to say I did not watch Tiny Fey's hosting job last weekend but have heard that the entire show was beyond fab. I mean these guys have had months and months to just "think" up new funny ideas. Then you add Ellen and you have brilliance. Enjoy!

TV updates for those of you like me who enjoy frying your brain

Lost Lost Lost. I know I know. I am Miss-Wannabe-Pop-Culture and I am the only person in America not watching it yet. I keep getting crap from multiple sources about it. Its in the works - all the current season eps are DVRed. Promise. One of these days. Until then... I will not share with you all the scoop and spoilers I find out about that show. Some of you I am sure like to enjoy it the old fashion way. However, according to Ausiello this is what I do know : first of all, ABC had originally planned to only air through episode 7 in March before starting up new post-strike episodes at the end of April, but it was just revealed that they will air through episode 8 for this first arc (even though supposedly ep 7 is a better stopping point for the pod). Then it gets better for you Losties, the show has landed the coveted post-Grey's Anatomy time slot on Thursdays at 9pm starting April 24th. And sources say if all goes well ABC might even keep this dream line-up on Thursdays into the fall. This is what Lost's revised sked looks like :
Episode 5: Feb. 28
Episode 6: March 6
Episode 7: March 13
Episode 8: March 20
Episode 9: April 24
Episode 10: May
Episode 11: May 8
Episode 12: May 15
Episode 13: May 22 (season finale)

Speak of the devil, TR Knight claims the Grey's Anatomy cast will be going back to work in the next few weeks to start production on its last five episodes that will begin airing April 24th. Thankfully for us, they might be five really good episodes. According to ma sources, creator Shonda Rimes is not going to change any story lines from pre-strike and is going to make the five episodes end as if they would have had the normal 13 or 14 episodes. What does that mean? They will be some wonderfully cluttered-action-and-drama-packed five episodes. Woohoo! 'Bout time something happens. Even if it is sans Pacey Witter.

I really think ABC's new comedy Miss/Guided is something to check out (especially for those of you who like that kind of thing. You know who you are). It is set to debut March 18th (9:30 pm right after Dancing with the Stars) - I am thinking they are hoping for a Samantha Who? reaction. The series is about a so-called ugly duckling (Judy Greer) who becomes a guidance counselor at her alma mater. The thing is, Judy Greer is a comical genius. She has always played the sidekick in most of her roles - and always outshines her leading counterparts. I mean she made 27 Dresses, 13 Going on 30, The Wedding Planner and even The Village the great movies that they are (once again, if you like that kind of thing). Seriously she is so funny. The show will move normally to Thursdays at 7pm thereafter... you can check out a short preview here.

NBC has ordered six more episodes of Lipstick Jungle. I am actually okay with that. Although I don't exactly love love this show, it is decent and certainly the better out of the two Sex and The City-wannabe shows, in which I am referring to Lipstick Jungle and Cashmere Mafia. Mafia is kinda dreadful. Kinda? I mean is. At least Jungle has Robert Buckley (Kirby) on its side. Its a yummy side. Like chocolate-and-whipped-cream yummy.

According to the adorable Adrian Grenier (Vince Chase), Entourage is, as we speak, back in production on its fifth season. Straight from the horse's mouth. It should premiere in early summer on HBO. Man I am excited. And man it bettah be better than Season 4. It was disappointing. And someone the other day... for the life of me I can't remember who it was... was trying to convince me that Entourage was cancelled. Was it you? Jerk. Seriously. Trying to make me doubt my television knowledge and Vincent Chase. The nerve. So I am happy to report *that person* was terribly wrong. C'mon E!

As I previously mentioned, it is official that we will not see anymore Heroes until fall. So sad. Is there any good news to this? Well the silver lining migh tbe that NBC ordered more than 22 episodes for next season (unheard of) and it looks like Heroes will totally deliver because they are starting production May 1st (opposed to end of summer). It looks like there might three different "arcs" to the season. Very exciting. Only thing is, it might be a bit darker (more?!) because word is they are looking to cast alot of "bad, evil" characters. Hmmmm.... Still up in the air? Kristen Bell. UGH! You better sign her Heroes people. She has not officially signed on the do the next season as of yet, but sources say they are in negotiations now. She has to!!! Now they have to work around her impending movie career! You can check out the trailer for Forgetting Sarah Marshall here.

Happy tubing!

Bourne numero quatre

A fourth Bourne movie? C’mon people let it go. Well since Bourne Ultimatum won three Oscars on Sunday – editing, sound editing and sound mixing – every category they were nominated for, the Universal Pictures folks have been freaking out trying to figure out how to extend this wonder trilogy. They are already trying to contact directors and Matt Damon to see if they can get another one rolling. Mind you I love BU and the other two Bourne flicks and would love nothing more than to see Matt Damon grace the screen as much as possible… BUT… didn’t Jason Bourne regain his memory in BU and thus solving the trilogy’s central conflict? Hmmm… I think you guys are grasping for straws. Let it be. We finally have a good trilogy that we can say all three films were quality. Let it be.

A new TV show, quarterlife, premieres tonight on NBC. I haven’t seen it yet but I think you should. Why in the world should you watch it? Well because it is by the makers of My So-Called Life (Marshall Herskovitz and Edward Zwick) is why. Geniuses. One of the best shows of all time. Oh how I miss Angela and Jordan. Swoon. Especially because those were the wonderful pre-freak Jared Leto days. Anyway, quarterlife was actually made for the internet and was originally only going to be shown there, but since the writer’s strike fiasco, NBC saw how brilliant it was and picked it up. It supposedly about some twentysomethings as they deal with relationships, careers, life, drama. Friends but more real (hence no picture-perfect-Ross-and-Rachel probably). You can catch the episodes now at quarterlife.com or check them out tonight (9pm, NBC)… I haven’t seen any yet… but I have heard this internet show buzzed about for some time now – should be good. Plus it has one of my favorite new actors – Scott Michael Foster - from one of my new fav guilty-pleasure shows, Greek.

Update : quarterlife - its different. I totally loved it. Catch it normally on Sundays at 8pm. Do it.

"I like invented her, you know what I mean?"

Just in case you have not seen the new extended preview of the continuation of the third season of The Hills, well you nee'ta and I am never one to keep things like this to myself. I am a share-er. One who shares. So new episodes begin in like a month - Monday March 24th - and it looks like its gonna be good season/continuation/thingy. Brody ditchin' Lauren, Whitney leaving Teen Vogue, Lauren befriending the She-Spencer, Audrina snuggling up to the Heidmeister behind Lauren's back??? Gasp! Oh no she di'int! Television just doesn't get any worse better than this. Yeah I can't wait either.

• MTV
• Music Videos
• MTV Shows
• Entertainment News

"I can't go to Taco Bell, I'm on an all-carb diet. Gosh Karen you're so stupid!" LOL. I am all about quoting Mean Girls tonight for some reason. Maybe its because the da Hills peeps remind me of high school drama even though they are in their 20's. Hmmm... But either way you need to get that movie out and watch it... and crack Gretchen Weiners! Such a classic, cinematic masterpiece... of sorts.

Scrumptious.

Okay dokay. Mixed emotions. Emotions mixed. The new extended Sex and The City trailer was just released today. Sigh. I just watched it and am a tad speechless. It is a whole lot more informational than the first trailer... and a bit spoilerific. If you don't want to know what the movie will really be about, than honestly I wouldn't watch it. Of course I had to because I have absolutely no restraint. But that's me. Of course its wonderful... but the movie is not going to be all roses-champagne-and-happy-endings-ish like I'd hoped. Dang you people and your be realistic mentality! Well, New Line has removed all trailers off the internet except for this one for now, so check out the new trailer here.

Reason # 463 to hate the Writer's Guild of America strike : We will no longer be seeing Pacey Witter grace the halls of Seattle Grace. As most everyone knew (I mentioned it a few times in anxious anticipation), Joshua Jackson was going to be on Grey's Anatomy for a multi-episode arc as a doctor... to eventually become Christina's love interest. He was to start shooting the week the writer's strike began. Well, that happened and now that its finally over... yep... he's no longer available. Actually the reason is pretty cool - he's busy filming in Vancouver. J.J. Abrams hand-picked Joshua to headline his new X-Files-esque Fox series Fringe - its the most buzzed about new show right now and is supposed to be the most expensive pilot ever produced (Lost previously held this title). However, that means we won't get to see him on Grey's. UGH! Pisses. Me. Off.

Friday Night Lights update : Word on da street is, pending a small huge miracle, it will not be returning to NBC. Yes this is a travesty on many levels. Why am I not crying out loud just yet? Because the other word on street is that the show is being shopped around and other networks seem genuinely interested in picking it up. Now this is always a rumor when a cult-loved show is cancelled and it very rarely happens, but it seems to be a distinct possibility for FNL because it is such goooooood television. The channels that are being included in the discussion are The CW, TNT, DirecTV, and Comcast Entertainment Group (includes E! and G4). It is such a unique, amazing show with unbelievable acting. Seriously the fact that Connie Britton has not won an Emmy, not to mention hasn't even been nominated, is downright preposterous. So if this show does get picked up - by who(m)ever (I hate grammar) - you bettah watch, fool.

I love it that those small Texas county speed traps will catch anyone! If you live outside of Texas - they really do. Including Aaron Carter early this morn. In possession of marijuana. Classy. Who is he? Good question. I think he is still sticking to his my-brother-is-a-now-defunct-Backstreet-Boy-but-I-dated-Lindsay-Lohan-and-Hilary-Duff-in-their-pre-pubescent-years-so-please-still-think-I-am-special claim. Poor thing. Even his dad is ashamed of him. Ouch. The Kimble County police station must be the place for the tweeners to be today... well in Junction, TX that is. Holla!

James McAvoy. Gosh could he be any cuter? I think he is such a brilliant actor. He was the only thing I liked about Becoming Jane, somehow made a faun seem adorable in Chronicles of Narnia, looks breathtaking in Atonement (which we have covered I have not yet seen), and seems to be the only reason I see to go see Penelope. He is just scrumptious. Below is his adorably cute appearance on Jay Leno this week... that Scottish accent... wow... deep breath.... yes ladies he's married. Devil!

Good TV please come back to me

As I mentioned earlier this week (I keep you guys so in the know), the Writer's Guild of America Strike is almost over. Like 99% over. So what does this mean for our favorite shows, really? The networks have been secretly trying to salvage some of the shows we all know and love. Well according to Ausiello, this is what we should expect for the rest of the spring. In case you all are not psychotic internet surfers like yours truly and have dug this up for yourselves, in alphabetical order (not in my-importance-order) here's the dealy-yo-yo: [Disclaimer : this is extremely tentative and subject to change]

24 - Expected to return this fall or January '09.
30 Rock - Expected to shoot 5 to 10 new episodes to air in April/May.
Back to You - Two pre-strike episodes remain. Future TBD*.
Bionic Woman - No new episodes expected. Ever. Ouch.
Big Love - Expected to go into production on Season 3 in March. Airdate info is TBD.
Bones - Four pre-strike episodes left. Unclear whether additional eps will be produced for this season.
Brothers & Sisters - Expected to shoot 4 or 5 new episodes to air in April/May.
Chuck - No new episodes until fall. Boo!
Criminal Minds - Expected to shoot 4 to 7 new episodes to air in April/May.
CSI; CSI : Miami & NY - Expected to shoot 4 to 7 new episodes to air in April/May.
Desperate Housewives - Expected to shoot 4 or 5 new episodes to air in April/May.
Dirty Sexy Money - No new episodes planned until fall; three remaining pre-strike episodes will undergo some tweaking and kick off fall run. Noooooooooo! Sad. :(
Everybody Hates Chris - Twelve pre-strike episodes remain.
Friday Night Lights - No new episodes expected for this season. Future TBD. FNL better get picked up for next season or I will freak. OUT.
Gossip Girl - Expected to shoot up to 9 new episodes to air in April/May/June. Yea!
Grey's Anatomy - Expected to shoot 4 or 5 new episodes to air in April/May Ugh. Who cares.
Heroes - TBD. My opinion : probably no new episodes until next fall.
House - Expected to shoot 4 to 6 new episodes to air in April/May.
How I Met Your Mother - Expected to shoot 5 to 7 new episodes to air in April/May. Legendary.
Las Vegas - Three pre-strike episodes remain. No additional episodes expected for this season.
Life - No new episodes expected until fall.
Lost - Six pre-strike episodes remain. Six additional episodes could air this season. I still haven't watched my DVRed eps of Lost. I know I know I need to get with it!
Men in Trees - Eleven pre-strike episodes remain. No additional episodes expected this season. - Eleven? Yea! Where are they??? I embarassingly love this show.
Moonlight - No new episodes expected until fall.
My Name Is Earl - Expected to shoot 8 to 10 new episodes to air in April/May.
NCIS - Expected to shoot 5 to 7 new episodes, only three of which may air this season.
The New Adventures of Old Christine - Seven pre-strike episodes remain.
Numbers - Expected to shoot 5 to 7 new episodes, only three of which may air this season.
October Road - Three pre-strike episodes remain. Future beyond that TBD.
The Office - Expected to shoot 5 to 10 new episodes to air in April/May. Hallelujah! I missed you boo.
One Tree Hill - Six pre-strike episodes remain. Future beyond that TBD.
Prison Break - Two pre-strike episodes remain. Future beyond that TBD.
Private Practice - Expected to shoot 4 or 5 new episodes to air in April/May.
Pushing Daisies - No new episodes until fall. So? I do not understand the obsession with this show.
Reaper - Three pre-strike episodes remain. Future beyond that TBD.
Samantha Who? - Three remaining pre-strike episodes could be held until fall (see DSMoney).
Scrubs - Four pre-strike episodes remain. Four additional episodes will likely be shot; unclear whether they'll air on NBC or go straight to DVD. That hurts. What awful timing for your final season.
Smallville - Four pre-strike episodes remain. Expected to shoot 3 to 5 add'l eps to air in April/May.
Supernatural - Two pre-strike episodes remain. Expected to shoot 3 to 5 add'l eps to air in April/May.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles - Five pre-strike eps remain. Future beyond that TBD.
Ugly Betty - Expected to shoot 4 or 5 new episodes to air in April/May.

Gasp. Entourage? I will try to find out. And of course this doesn't include all of the "classy and entertaining" reality television that we will continue to enjoy this spring. Although I am not as much of a fan as some, I will say I can never get enough of The Hills, Real World/Road Rules Challenges, and ANTM (premieres Feb 20!!!) to name a few. And to those of you who do not watch any television and so therefore this does not apply.... well you are simply better and more sophisticated than I. Because I. Still. Love. It.

"I like my money where I can see it - hanging in my closet" - Carrie

Diane Von Furstenberg's message to her models before they walked her show at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week 2008. Love love love it. I want to be at Bryant Park right now. Tents, cameras, fabrics, heels, color, stick-insect-models, eye liner, I want to be there. New York Fashion Week 2008. Are there any words to describe my envy for the rich, famous and fashionable at this moment? Nope. I want to see the latest fashions (Monique Lhuillier, Luca Luca, Zac Posen, Rachel Roy, Tracy Reese, Rock & Republic, DVF, Rag & Bone, Vera Wang Lavender, etc), the celebrities all gussied up, and most importantly... the make up lines. Swoon. They are fab beyond fab. And the absolute top make up artists in the world are there. It seems that the smoky eye and nude lip is still the rage (yea! my favorite - they rocked especially at the Boy By Band of Outsiders show) but really light eyes and dark lips have been popping up this week as well (like pale, white eye liners and dark dark lips - like deep burgundies. Errr).

And if I were there, I could hang out with people like this (left). I want to be in the middle of that picture. I want to be their friends. Talk about the coolest chicks ever. Kristen Bell (my words could not do Veronica Mars justice), Sophia Bush (One Tree Hiller who once was married to Chad Michael Murray and dated Tony Romo), Blake Lively (I really like Gossip Girl), and Becki Newton (freaking hilarious genius as Amanda on Ugly Betty). If only I was famous enough to chill at Fashion Week... Sigh. But you know who I have seen has been everywhere? Sophia Bush. I think she is stunningly goregous but girlfriend has been looking fierce in her fashion week outfits hitting tons of labels such as Herve Leger, Rock and Republic, DVF to name a few. Shoot if I was quasi-famous, thats what I would be doing too.

The Hills' ladies got a job! Since "dumped" by Teen Vogue, NYMag is reporting that both Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port are now going to be working at PR firm, People's Revolution. They are supposedly working their patooties off at Fashion Week at a number of different labels. OMG. If we get to see backstage footage of NY Fashion Week on da Hills I might just convulse out of happiness. Freaking awesome job. Sigh... all you have to do is get yoself famous for absolutely no reason at all... and you can get any job you want. Its the new American dream. To the right is a pic of Whitness working the Sass and Bide show this weekend.

Speaking of The Hills, I can not let you go without sharing this. It could be the most ridiculous thing I have seen in a long time. And I purposefully watch retarded stuff. For some reason unknown to the rest of humanity, Heidi Montag made a music video for her new song, "Higher". Oh, people. Its excellent beyond words. I truly believe that my dog, Angel, who is a moron by canine standards, could have done a better job making a music video. But, alas, Spencer himself directed it. It is pathetic and high-larious at the same time. Poor thing she's so ridiculous... rolling around on the beach with her cheap Hawaiian Tropics Tanning Oil bottle and her plastic-ness scaring pigeons away.... you just can't write this stuff. Since I can not bring myself to actually "post" it on my blog, please check it out here. Puh-lease!

Mannings continue their world domination

Wow. I will fully admit that I never thought they could do it : New York Giants defeated the New England Patriots to win Super Bowl 42. Woot woot! I was hoping Tom Brady's streak would end but lets be honest it was a long shot. I am really happy for Eli Manning... even though I still have issues after his 2004-NFL-Draft-San-Diego-Phillip-Rivers-debacle... it made me dislike him for a long time... but I love the Manning family and am thrilled to see Brady and the Patriots go down. Down! I don't like Tom Brady and his "I am a god, I can do no wrong, and guess what - check out my Stetson commericals - I am hot too!" complex. But those darn Mannings. Peyton winning last year and Eli this year... the media and PR companies' minds must be racing with ideas of how to market them as a twosome. Seriously they need to become breeding machines. And, like, sell their offspring. Just an idea. Stop judging for the thought... you know it would totally work. I am still in denial that this officially marks the end of football season. What am I going to do?

Did anyone actually see this - Paula Abdul's "comeback"? More like go back. Bad lip syncing and electronic voice overs - it actually seemed a little Britney Spears-esque. What is she thinking? She's almost fifty running around in spandex. I was crossing my fingers hoping she would pull an Ashlee Simpson and her background music would skip on her... well that or that she would bust out a remix of "Cold Hearted Snake". That would have made my day.

I still haven't watched the season premiere of Lost. I know - for once I am oh so behind the times. Yes I am usually up on the goings on, okay? We all have downfalls. I stopped watching Lost during its second season because, well at the time I had too many shows to keep up with. But now... with the lovely writer's strike dragging on like a bad stomach flu, I have to watch something. So I am reverting back to it. Its been DVRed, but I still haven't watched the season four premiere - its supposed to be fab and shocking. I am going to try and catch up a bit before I dive in. Speaking of the writers strike - GOOD NEWS : according to my "sources" an agreement of some sort has been reached with the WGA and will be announced sometime this week. What does this mean? We might see some (like, a few) episodes of our favorite shows by April/May. I have heard shows like Grey's Anatomy and Desperate Housewives for sure will start back to production... but more serial ones (Lost, Heroes, 24) are still up in the air along with new shows that were picked up for full seasons (Pushing Daisies, Chuck, Gossip Girl). No word yet on The Office. Grrr.

The man of our McDreams can't help his crap show

Talk about smiling with your eyes. Tyra would be proud. I wanted to give you all something delightful to focus on this afternoon... Patrick Demspey in his new Versace ads. I know. Yowza. McDreamy + Versace = Swoon.

Since you have something pretty to look at, this also gives me a moment to complain about Grey's Acrapomy, especially since the "season finale" aired this past Thursday and that is all we will probably get this year. Sigh. I just need to vent. What happened? After the disaster that was the season finale last spring, we were promised a more uplifting, brighter, "building" season. I don't know about you, but that is not what I consider this fall to have been. Constantly sad and depressing, it has been one somber scene after another. Of course only let Dr Sheperd and Merideth be happy for ten seconds... how obvious was it that McDreamy would pick McThorny (Rose)? I don't like her and don't think she brings anything interesting to the show... besides what - her honesty? Gag me.

And what freaking happened to Gizzie (George and Izzie lovin')? I love how they just let it fizz out and go away... did they think we are idiots and wouldn't notice that one day George is leaving his wife to be with Izzie because they are so in love and the next they just aren't together (despite a few bad days)and there's no fallout? Annoying. Why should we be surprised that Bailey's husband left her ? Oh we shouldn't. Then there is Alex. Eva leaving was heartbreaking. Then there's the Lexie hookup which seemed odd... but then the nanosecond Alex and Lexie seemed to be somewhat touching together... you bring Eva back but not permanently... just long enough to break Alex AND Lexie's heart. Lovely. And on top of it all - you kill Seth Green. No ma'am. That is not okay in my book.

And (I know - how many "ands" can there be - oh girlfriend I could go on and on) why aren't we giving McSteamy a love interest? Hello! All that chisled-features-hotness is being wasted. Wasted! Yes we get that he hits on Dr. Hahn and she's not interested... we got that the first fifteen times it happened. Sheesh. You people are not using your best - and by best I mean yummiest - asset. Who knows - maybe bringing Pacey Witter (Joshua Jackson) in as Christina's love interest could have been light and funny to watch but thanks to the Writers Guild of America (who are now picketing the Grammys as well!!!) we will never know... and I doubt it anyways. Plus, you can mark my words that Katherine Heigl will not be on it much longer at all. It is being projected that her new movie coming out Friday, 27 Dresses, is going to be a big hit (told ya) and therefore that will make it her second box office "hit" in a row (first was Knocked Up). And movie stars very rarely stay on the TV screen... anyone remember that ER star named George Clooney? Exactly. Plus the more interviews I read, the more arrogant Katherine seems (she was the one who threw a fit when Kate Walsh got the Private Practice spin-off instead of her) and she thinks she's too good for Grey's anyways. I am starting to agree with her on that one.

Grey's Anatomy regrettably is no longer a show I really look forward to watching. I understand that it is a drama, but what made us all fall in love with it was its warm, quirky, comedic personality which seems to be non-existent these days. I just don't percieve it as being enjoyable anymore. Yes now that is something to mourn.